i also remembered that i left her with her father and these photos on the wall were his memories with her. but they weren't just pictures of her as a child, they were pictures of everyone in our lives as children. a chronological merge of lives starting on one wall and traveling up the walls around the whole room. i felt sad looking at this because i didn't know any of these memories.
i wanted to call my mom and tell her what i was sad about and that i had returned to earth. then i remembered that i never told anyone from my family that i was pregnant when it happened. i thought they would be sad at me because i wasn't married. or maybe they wouldn't be mad at me, i just figured they would take the news badly. i felt sad that i hadn't been a part of my daughters life and that she wouldn't know who i was and would never like me. so i went back to the ship.
richard alpert was there, but something seemed different about him. my team was getting back on the ship and because i felt so sad, i decided to go with them. our ship was stuck to a large magnet which kept it grounded on earth. richard had broken the nobs that we needed to press to release the magnet. his eyes were huge and scary. he was running all over the place. i thought he probably has rabies. i asked him. do you have rabies or something? he said a lot of mumbles in my direction. i realized he was probably the bad guy in my dream. i didn't trust him from then on.
i climbed this really tall ladder to the top of the ship where you enter. everyone from my team was in the tube hallway waiting to get in. richard said he was going to throw up two explosives that would go off inside our ship, but not cause any damage. he said when the explosives went off it would give us the right amount of movement to release us from the large magnet. they trusted him. i did not. the explosives came up the ladder and tunnel flying by our heads like he said. and they were okay. but then richard came up the ladder too and he had a tranquilizer that he was trying to stab everyone with so we wouldn't get on the ship. he had a mustache. i took the needle out of his hand and stabbed him in the back with it. my suit made me look really cool. i felt bad for stabbing him but then i changed my mind because i realized he probably would have killed us. i felt bad about leaving earth because its a beautiful planet but then i changed my mind because i knew i had to. i felt bad about not staying with my daughter and her father. but i did not change my mind about this feeling. i kept feeling bad about this. even after i got on the ship. i woke up.